Autumn Song: About Everything & Nothing

Have you ever had a feeling to stop and look around? I mean to turn and look back to your life? We are so deeply immersed in the whirl of events that we do actions mechanically one by one, perform deeds without looking back and don't think about what is happening to us. And than there is a moment when we have a feeling that we don't understand something in the events logic, to be more precise, the feeling that we have missed something... something quite simple... but important at the same time...And even though quoting Pasternak, one shall not distinguish defeats from victories, everthing happening to us has its logic... the life has that of it's own though...

That's why sometimes it's quite helpful just to stay, turn back and think. The past is full of events from which you want to run far; there are also a lot of plesant moments you recollect sadly regretting about impossibility to repreat them. But the time wears off sharpness of your perception... And one day you are able to take a chance and look back, if not indifferently but, at least, dispassionately... And than return to your present and reflect... What did I want back then? What do I need know? How has it happened to me to be there where I am now? Is my life seemed to have been backwound like a cassette tape? Or is the life going over a spiral? And now am I coming just through a new turn that gives me a chance to change something, in myself, first of all? The questions are so simple... but sometimes it's so difficult to answer... The answer is somewhere closely, perhaps... Just on the surface... You just have to see it, haven't you?..